Thursday, November 17, 2011

There are many cumbersome ways to kill a man...I mean, heal a broken heart

Let's say I know someone who found herself deep in the throes of an little bit of an unrequited love situation for, oh let's say the greater part of the year. This mostly bitter and only occasionally tantalizingly sweet ordeal was punctuated by melodrama and much, much agonizing (because we all know love is the purest form of agony) with friends, family, colleagues and strangers in strange places, and eventually culminated in a resolute declaration that the smithereens that her heart had broken into would never be reconstituted again. Well, it is my pleasure to write that this hapless young woman's heart has in fact reconstituted itself and is well and truly recovered from what can only be described as a highly emotionally taxing situation no human being deserves to endure. There are so many reasons why she has recovered and so many contributory factors to her arrival at the place of sanity and wellness that it would easily take me months to chronicle them all. I can however, quite confidently say that a very large role was played by the music industry, for it was in music that she came to the realisation of the (rather obvious) fact that hers was not the first situation of this type and if simple, ordinary people like multi-platinum recording artists could seemingly experience and overcome these things to the extent that they could even use them to earn a living, well then surely, a bright young fox like me (I mean, this young woman) could do likewise and come out on top? The following is a taste, a mere sample, of the soundtrack of an eclectic muso's journey out of the mire of ill-fated love. You could also think of it as a five step algorithm to getting over a broken heart. If you get stuck on any step go back to the one before. The fact that I can blog about this without being reduced to a heap of incoherent, jumbled up emotions is proof that it works!

Lesson 1: Hey, it happens to the best of us...


Daniel Bedingfield: If you're not the one.


Angie Stone: Snowflakes.


Dela: Lucy's and Loose Leafs.


Gabrielle: Out of reach


Juanes and Nelly Furtado: Fotografia


Lea Salonga - On my own (Les Miserables)
Diam's: SOS


Love is coming undone and hearts are breaking all over the world in different ways, for different reasons and in different languages. Who are you but a mere mortal to expect to be exempt from these things?

Lesson 2: Shake it off, champ. Just keep walking...


Madonna: Power of goodbye



Dido: Hunter
Maxwell: Pretty Wings:

Lupe Fiasco: The show goes on
Coolio: See you when you get there
Joss Stone: Could have been you

Coldplay: Paradise

Tough break, Johnny; just keep walking ..


Lesson 3: Don't just walk around in circles. You need to be walking AWAY from the object of your unrequited limerence and TOWARDS the person you used to be before you lost yourself. The old you was doing just fine before this whole debacle; the old you was aces...Even better if you can walk towards an even better version of yourself the world has never seen: wiser, stronger, better, more sympathetic with your audience, as it were..:-)

Enigma: Return to innocence
...if you want, then start to laugh, if you must then start to cry...
Lupe Fiasco: Beautiful lasers (2 ways)
...find a reason...simplest things, you really like summer, you really like music, you really like reading...
R. Kelly: The storm is over now
... I can see the sunshine (somewhere beyond the clouds)...

Oren Lavie: Her morning elegance
...and she fights for her life...

Common: Blue sky
...this is my Inception, I'm writing my dreams...immortal view of a star doing what I'm born to do...


U2 - Walk on So go on then. Time to do all those things you failed to do because you were busy wallowing in the sea of cathexis!

Lesson 4: if the darkness tries to creep up on you again assault it with positive self talk and think happy thoughts. The following music never fails to put a smile on my face.


Bobby McFerrin: Don't worry be happy
...don't bring everybody down!


Lupe Fiasco: Just might be OK
...affirmative, no further furnishing is needed...I believe we are completed...


OMC: How bizarre
...ooh baby, it's making me crazy...


Cornershop: Brimful of Asha
...she's the one that keeps the dream alive, from the morning, past the evening, til the end of the night...


Jimmy Cliff: I can see clearly now
...all of the bad feelings have disappeared, here is the rainbow I've been praying for, it's gonna be a bright, sunshiney day...


Queen: We are the champions


We are the champions, 
we are the champions, 
no time for losers,
 cause we are the champions... of the world! 

That's right. Not the room, office, city or country. We are the champions of the WORLD!
Don't be choosy. Take your happy fix however you can get it: a funny joke, a funny friend, an uplifting book, song or activity. Lap it up! And don't be afraid to exaggerate your self efficacy and play up your awesomeness. If you're feeling down and out then chances are you're underestimating it already so you'll just about hit the mark if you go a little overboard with the positive self talk. 

Lesson 5: Keep hope alive! No one likes a bitter, jaded, sourpuss so expect better, expect more and be ready for it. 
Rachel's: Water from the same source
Just pure instrumental genius that inspires and reinvigorates me!

I for one, am an insatiable optimist and fully expect this fantastic young lady to look back on this past year one day and throw her head back in laughter as she rides into the sunset with James Franco/ Michael Ealy/ Thierry Henry/ John Legend/ Jared Leto/ Common/ Ryan Reynolds/ Columbus Short/ Lupe Fiasco... the possibilities are without end!

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